Quotes from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

Clark:
Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?

Michael Vaughn tells the truth

One Month after Syd comes back--

FBI CAMPUS-

“Okay class, we have a visitor from the CIA today. He is a good friend of mine and he is going to talk to you about surveillance.” Vaughn said. The door opened.“Class this is Eric…” Vaughn looked over at the door and just starred.“Um, excuse me for a second.” Vaughn said to his class. He walked over to Sydney who was dressed in a business suit.“Weiss said he was doing this.” Vaughn said.“Well it’s nice to see you too.” Syd said.“Weiss couldn’t come so I’m filling in. I’ll be in and I’ll be out, I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Syd said. She walked past him and set her briefcase down on Vaughn’s desk. Vaughn watched her.“Hello, my name is Sydney Bristow and I’ve been with the CIA for 3 years.” Syd said. Vaughn stood there and watched her. “3 Years? She’s been gone for 2 of them. Which made my life a living hell.” Vaughn thought to himself.“So you’re a spy?” Joe asked from the top row.“Let’s just say I don’t work at a desk.” Syd said. Everyone giggled.“So is it true that if you are female you have to sleep with guy’s to gain Intel?” Someone asked. Before Sydney could answer Vaughn stepped in.“Mr. Andrews, I know we would all love to sit here and listen to your government conspiracies further more, but, Syd…Ms. Bristow, has a work to do. So let her lecture you.” Vaughn said sitting on a bookshelf.“I guess it’s better to hear her talk than you.” Joe said. Everyone laughed.“Well if you don’t like listening to me talk I can always give you a report.” Vaughn said. Joe sat there. His smile diminished.“As I was saying, surveillance is a very long process. You have to be quite and patient. You may follow a suspect for a few days or up to two weeks it depends on how important they are.” Syd said.“Can I ask you a question?” A girl said.“Shot.” Syd said leaning on the desk.“Are you the woman that disappeared two years ago?” She asked. Sydney looked at her with a straight face.“No, I’m not.” Syd said.“Well It’s just, you look a lot like the woman Mr. Vaughn told us about.” Marie said.“He said he was in lov…”“Marie that’s enough.” Vaughn said. Marie sat back down.“Sometimes love can bite you in the ass.” She turned to Vaughn.“Isn’t that right Mr. Vaughn?” Syd asked. She gave him a hard glare.“Any way, your basic signs for…”“Yeah It can.” Vaughn said. Sydney fell silent as did the classroom.“Especially when the only person you’ve ever loved disappears without a trace.” Vaughn said. Sydney looked at the ground.“The basic signs that you are being followed are…”“Then you spend a year and a half looking for them. Paying thousands of dollars to enemies just trying to dig up Intel.” Vaughn said.“If someone keeps following you down rural streets…” Syd was interrupted again.“Then you find a body, beyond recognition but it has the same features. It had the necklace that I gave you on our first real date. The same tooth missing from when you were tortured.” Vaughn said. Sydney eyes were getting a little moist.“And the note attached.” Vaughn said. Sydney’s eyes shot up at him. Vaughn shook his head.“Yeah a note, no one ever told you because I was the one that found it. One night I thought I was so close to finding you, I did, or that’s what I thought. Do you know what it’s like finding the woman you love dead. The woman that you would spend hours just starring at because she was so beautiful, and then all of a sudden couldn’t look at because it made you sick to your stomach and made you want to kill yourself right there. That image will never leave my mind, as much as I tell myself it wasn’t you, I can’t.” Vaughn said with tears in his eyes. The class was silent, the girls were crying and the guys sat there not knowing what to do.“That day was the last day of my life. Part of me died with you. I still don’t know how to love. Just because I got drunk one night and accidentally got married to a woman I only considered a friend. That doesn’t mean I love her, I just don’t want to hurt anyone anymore. When you found out I was married I know it tore your heart out. Because for the first time in 3 years you thought I wasn’t there for you. You thought I didn’t love you. The truth is Sydney, I’ve been here, I always have, I promised you that, I never made a promise to you I couldn’t keep, and I’m not about to start.” Vaughn said. Sydney was crying now as was Vaughn.“It pains me to look at you. I know I hurt you, and I want to make it up to you, as a friend.” Vaughn said. Sydney’s heart fell when he said friend.“And if you’ll take me back, as even more.” Vaughn said. Sydney just starred at him.“You probably haven’t noticed.” Vaughn said. He held up his left hand.“There’s no ring.” Vaughn said. Sydney froze.“We went separate ways after you came back. The divorce was final as of yesterday.” Vaughn said.“Sydney, I have always been in love with you. Everyone that has ever seen us together knows we belong together, well, everyone except your father.” Vaughn said smiling. Everyone laughed softly. Sydney just starred at him.“Sydney I would drop everything right now, I would leave all of this behind and I run away with you. You’re all I care about.” Vaughn said.“Hey, us too.” Someone said. Vaughn laughed.“Yes, I love you guys too.” Vaughn said. He turned back to Syd.“I just want things to be like they used too. Syd, we never cared about protocol or what other people thought. Ever obstacle that came between us we climbed over it. One thing that I regret is never telling you how much you mean to me.” Vaughn said. He got up and walked over to her. He whispered in her ear.“Sydney, I love you.” Vaughn said. Sydney sobbed and threw her arms around Vaughn’s neck.“I love you too.” Syd said. “I love you too, Michael.” Syd said. “AWWW!” Everyone said. “You wont be saying that in a second.” Vaughn said. He pulled away a little and kissed her.“EWW! Come on get a room!” Joe yelled. Vaughn and Syd both laughed. Everyone suddenly stopped laughing. Vaughn knew who was behind him.“Play along.” Vaughn whispered in Syd’s ear.“So basically that is one way that you can manipulate your enemy, second.” Vaughn turned around.“Mr. Ruffolo.” Vaughn said.“What is going on here?” Mr. Ruffolo asked.“We were showing them how to act, so people wont suspect you.” Syd said.“That better be it, Vaughn, otherwise your through.” “Sir, this will be my last year. I think I’m going to reinsign to the CIA.” Vaughn said.“We can talk later.” Mr. Ruffolo said he walked out. Everyone laughed. Vaughn turned back around and started to make out with Syd again. He broke away.“Class dismissed, no homework.” Vaughn said. Everyone was frozen.“Okay, get out before I throw you out.” Vaughn said. Everyone ran out the door. Vaughn locked it and closed the blinds. He walked back over to Syd.“Now, where did we leave off two years ago?” Vaughn asked.“Santa Barbara.” Syd said smiling.“Good idea. We can do that later though.” Vaughn said. He kissed her again.-30 minutes later-Vaughn picked up his briefcase as Sydney just watched his every movement. He laughed.“I’m not going to get any better looking.” Vaughn said. Syd laughed.“You’re right, you know why, you’re perfect.” Syd said. Vaughn smiled.“And you’re amazing.” Vaughn said kissing her. He erased the board and wiped off his hands. He went into the drawer and took out a box. Sydney looked at him confused.“I haven’t used this in two years.” Vaughn said taking out his silver pistol. He took out he magazine and popped it back in and aimed it at the window.“This time, no ones going to take you from me.” Vaughn said he put on his shoulder holster and placed the gun inside. He put on his jacket and reached for Syd’s hand.“Come on.” Vaughn said. Syd took his hand and they walked out of the classroom. They walked trough the grass.“Vaughn our cars are over there.” Syd said pointing to her right. Vaughn smiled.“I’d rather walk.” Vaughn said. Syd smiled and put her hand around his waist.“Syd?” Vaughn asked.“Yeah.” Syd said.“No matter what, I will never give up on you. I promise.” Vaughn said. Vaughn stopped.“I want to ask you something.” Vaughn said. Sydney started to panic.“I’m not proposing, well not marriage. Not yet at least.” Vaughn said. He took out his wallet.“Here.” Vaughn said holding out the key.“Remember when I was supposed to give it to you? I was going to give it to you in Santa Barbara.” Vaughn said. Syd took the key into her hand.“I want you to move in with me.” Vaughn said. Syd just looked at him.“Really?” Syd asked.“Yeah, if it’s to early it’s okay you don’t have too.” Vaughn said. Syd looked down.“Vaughn, what about Francie?” Syd asked. “I don’t want to leave her alone.” Syd said.“She’ll be fine.” Vaughn said.“How do you know?” Syd asked.“She hasn’t told you?” Vaughn asked.“Told me what?” Syd asked.“Her and Weiss have been on and off ever since you left.” Vaughn said.“What? Oh I seriously need to have a talk with that girl.” Syd said. Vaughn laughed.“Come on.” Vaughn said. “I think it’s about time you see where I live.” Vaughn said. They walked about a mile until they came upon an upscale apartment complex.“You live here?” Syd asked.“We.” Vaughn said. Syd smiled. They walked inside and took the elevator to the top floor.“How did you ever find a view like this in LA?” Syd asked. Looking out over a lake.“I was just lucky.” Vaughn said putting his arms around her. Syd smiled.“So I think you should give me the grand tour.” Syd said. Vaughn led her through the house.“And the last stop.” Vaughn said opening the door.“The bedroom.” Vaughn said. Syd walked around and smiled. He had matching black sheets and pillow cases a TV hanging from the wall and a glass table next to the bed. Sydney fell onto the bed.“I can tell I’m going to like it here.” Syd said.“I’m glad.” Vaughn said. He climbed on top of her and kissed her.

-THE END-

Hot Guys I Know

1. Brian
2. Jason
3. Mike
4. Tim
5. Matt
6. Justin M.
7. Ryan M.
8. Jon
9. Hot army guy in my english class
10. Ryan
11. Ben
12. DJ
13. Michael
14. Sam
15. Alex

an updated 152 of The Hottest Guys On Movies and Tv

1. Michael Vartan - Alias
2. Chris Evans - Fantastic Four
3. Josh Lucas - Sweet Home Alabama
4. John Travolta - Grease
5. Matt LeBlanc - FRIENDS
6. Matthew Perry - FRIENDS
7. Ethan Embry - DRAGNET
8. Geoff Stults - 7th Heaven
9. George Stults - 7th Heaven
10. Barry Watson - 7th Heaven
11. David Gallegher - 7th Heaven
12. Andrew Keegan - 7th Heaven
13. James Marsters - Buffy The Vampire Slayer
14. Nicolas Brendan - Buffy The Vampire Slayer
15. Seth Green - Buffy The Vampire Slayer
16. David Boreanaz - Angel
17. Alexis Denisof - Angel
18. Eric McCormack - Will and Grace
19. Sean Hayes - Will and Grace
20. George Clooney - Batman and Robin
21. Anthony Edwards - ER
22. Ethan Hawke - Alias
23. Ewan McGregor - Moulin Rouge
24. Christian Slater - Broken Arrow
25. Justin Nimmo - Power Rangers Lost In Space
26. Christopher Khayman Lee - Power Rangers Lost In Space
27. Austin St. John - Mighty Morphin Power Rangers
28. Heath Ledger - A Knight's Tale
29. Ryan Reynolds - National Lampoon's Van Wilder
30. Hugh Jackman - Someone Like You
31. Tom Welling - Cheaper By The Dozen
32. Jason David Frank - Power Rangers Turbo
33. Orlando Bloom - Pirates of The Caribbean
34. Russell Crowe - Gladiator
35. Jim Carrey - Liar Liar
36. Mel Gibson - Conspiracy Theory
37. Arnold Swarzenegger - Terminator 2 and 3
38. Sylvester Stallone - Judge Dredd
39. Armand Assante - Judge Dredd
40. Antonio Banderas - Assassins
41. Harrison Ford - Air Force One
42. Sean Connery - Entrapment
43. Woody Harrelson - Will and Grace
44. Richard Gere - Runaway Bride
45. David Spade - Just Shoot Me
46. Dean Cain - Futuresport
47. Donald Faison - Uptown Girls
48. Noah Wyle - ER
49. Goran Visinjic - ER
50. Eric LaSalle - ER
51. Harry Connick Jr. - Will and Grace
52. Nate Richert - Sabrina Teenage Witch
53. George Eads - CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
54. Hugh Grant - Two Weeks Notice
55. Tom Cruise - Mission: Impossible 1 & 2
56. Benjamin Bratt - Miss Congeniality
57. Brad Pitt - Troy, Interview With The Vampire
58. Wesley Snipes - Blade
59. Kevin Costner - Tin Cup
60. Joaquin Phoenix - Ladder 49, Signs
61. Marc Blucas - Buffy The Vampirer Slayer
62. Michael J. Fox - Spin City, Back To The Future
63. Charlie Sheen - Spin City
64. Owen Wilson - Behind Enemy Lines
65. Bruce Willis - Armageddon
66. Kevin Sorbo - Andromeda
67. Kevin Smith - Xena: Warrior Princess
68. Ben Affleck - Jersey Girl, Forces of Nature
69. Matt Damon - The Bourne Identity
70. Vin Diesel - XXX, Fast and The Furious, The Chronicles of Riddick
71. Colin Farrell - S. W. A. T.
72. Cuba Gooding Jr. - Jerry Maguire
73. Kevin Bacon - Footloose
74. The Rock - The Scorpion King, Walking Tall
75. Nicolas Cage - Gone In Sixty Seconds
76. David Duchovny - Evolution, X-Files
77. Sean Patrick Flannery - Simply Irresistable
78. Will Smith - Bad Boys II, Independence Day
79. John Cusack - Con Air, Sixteen Candles
80. Freddie Prinze Jr. - She's All That
81. Matthew Lillard - Scream, Thirteen Ghosts
82. Tobey Maguire - Spiderman 2, Seabiscuit
83. James Franco - Spiderman 2
84. Keanu Reeves - Constantine
85. Ryan Phillipe - Cruel Intentions
86. Denzel Washington - The Preacher's Wife
87. Michael T. Weiss - The Pretender
88. John Wayne - The Quiet Man
89. Clark Gable - Gone With The Wind
90. Joe Rogan - Fear Factor
91. Joseph Gordon Levitt - 3rd Rock From The Sun
92. Leonardo Dicaprio - Catch Me If You Can
93. Rupert Everett - The Next Best Thing
94. Shane West - A Walk To Remember
95. Karl Urban - Ghostship
96. Luke Wilson - Charlie's Angels
97. Robert De Niro - Analyze This, Analyze That
98. Patrick Swayze - Dirty Dancing
99. Kurt Russell - Soldier
100. Kiefer Sutherland - 24: The Series
101. Jason Priestly - Beverly Hills 90210
102. Brian Austin Green - Beverly Hills 90210
103. Johnny Depp - Secret Window
104. Humphrey Bogart - Casablanca
105. Wayne Brady - Whose Line Is It Anyway
106. Ryan Gosling - Breaker High
107. Chris Conrad - Young Hercules
108. Clarence Gilyard - Matlock
109. Robin Williams - Bicentennial Man
110. Dougray Scott - Ever After
111. Brendan Fraser - The Mummy 1 & 2
112. Matthew Broderik - Godzilla
113. L. L. Cool J. - S. W. A. T.
114. Daniel Day Lewis - The Last of The Mohicans
115. Cary Elwes - The Princess Bride
116. Alec Baldwin - Beetlejuice
117. Billy Baldwin -
118. Stephen Baldwin - Fear Factor (celebrity)
119. Vince Vaughn - Psycho
120. Chris O' Donnell - The Bachelor
121. David Hasselhoff - Baywatch
122. Bruce Campbell - Adventures of Brisco County Jr.
123. Ben Savage - Boy Meets World
124. Fred Savage - Boy Meets World
125. Will Friedle - Boy Meets World
126. Matthew Lawrence - Boy Meets World
127. Emilio Estevez - Young Guns
128. Paul Rudd - Clueless
129. John Cooper - Skillet (music group)
130. Gage - Walker Texas Ranger
131. Tommy Lee Jones - Man of The House
132. Martin Lawrence - Bad Boys II
133. Tony Danza - Who's The Boss
134. Ted Danson - Three Men and A Baby
135. Mike Damus - Teen Angel
136. Corbin Allred - Teen Angel
137. Jonathon Taylor Thomas - Home Improvement
138. Zachery Ty Bryan - Home Improvement
139. Joshua Jackson - Dawson's Creek
140. Dean O' Gorman - Young Hercules
141. Paul Gross - Due South
142. Steven Seagal - On Deadly Ground
143. Matt Dillon - There's Something About Mary
144. Adam LaVorgna - 7th Heaven
145. Sean William Scott - American Pie 1 & 2, American Wedding
146. Mekhi Phifer - ER
147. Usher - She's All That
148. Ashton Kutcher - Dude Where's My Car
149. Rock Hudson - Pillow Talk
150. Jesse McCartney - Summerland
151. Carson Daly - MTV's TRL
152. Josh Hartnett - Hollywood Homicide